Okay, so what is classier than box wine? Making a delicious, expensive sounding, Sangria out of that box wine! Here's what you need to do:

To start you need a lot of wine, preferably the cheapest wine you can get in a large amount (like everyone's college favorite FRANZIA). This wine should have a really simple taste to it - you do not need any of that fancy "oaky flavor" grape-named wine - in fact the cheaper it is the better. Seeing as this is Sangria Blanca you want the wine to be white.

We need a vessel (or a few vessels) for this magical summer elixer so grab a punch bowl or some other large liquid-holding container you can find.

Next you need a cucumber - wash it off and slice thin (1/4 - 1/2 inch slices) sections, set the sections to the side (in a clean area!), or in the (clean!) vessel. If you place them in the container you wiill use you will save yourself some extra clean up so this is the best option. You do not need to "peel" the cucumber - but you may if you prefer.

After that you need a cantaloupe - peel it, and cut some nice medium (bite sized) chunks. Throw them in with the cucumber.

If you have any other fruit in your fridge, you know the stuff that you bought because you're trying to be healthy but havent eaten and its getting old, chop some of that up and throw it in too. This isn't science and you can add whatever you like - just make sure the Cucumber and Melon are more visible so you can call it Cucumber Melon Sangria Blanca without questions from your judgemental friends and neighbors.

See what nearly empty bottles of booze you have left from your bender last week, or go over to Lindsay Lohans' house and you're bound to find something we can use as the kicker to this summer of love beverage. Set the booze aside (or if your at Lindsays house try to sneak out and avoid kicking around all the empty bottles and waking her up)

We will also need something to sweeten the mixture - you can use honey, simple syrup, sugar, sugar in the raw (the ones you stole from Starbucks ... err pocketed to add to your drink later are fine). If it's sweet it's in! You want about 1/8 - 1/4 cup of whatever you you decide on  - yes you can use more if you want, IDC (I Don't Care for those of you who are not hip to internet speak).

Then... and this is the best part ... mix it all up! Let it all soak together overnight (in the fridge) before serving so the flavors all blend together and it is nice and chilled, 24 hours is preferred. You just found this recipe and your party is in an hour? Whatever, it's totally fine and its alcohol so nobody will care as long as its free and looks good, let it chill for an hour then - but the longer it sits the better it tastes.

After all of your hard work and waiting you can finally consume it! Voila! Your an instant beverage celebrity and everyone will want you to make your secret "low cal and healthy sounding" ©®™ beverage for their parties. You might even finally get laid - by someone willing - and Lindsay doesn't count because she was passed out!